So I saw this question on my Facebook timeline and it really made me stop and ask myself and what really shocked me is that I didn’t have an automatic answer.
So I’m just going to figure it out right here with you guys.
So boom, while a female friend is VERY vital to your sanity in this world I do believe in seasonal people. I know what you’re thinking, men are just as seasonal so what are you REALLY saying Lo?
When it comes to the dynamic between a man and woman, there is so much more that goes into that situation. You have to consider soul ties, you have to consider your way of life (if ya’ll have bills together, kids together, and you have to consider that this is somebody you’re doing LIFE with)
So while yes, you trade secrets, gossip, tears, and wine with your girlfriends, it’s going to be a little harder for you to tear away from someone that is a piece of you. That doesn’t mean DON’T tear away, I’m just trying to provide justification for why a female friend may be a little more disposable than your toxic relationship.
Also for clarity purposes, I’m referring to somebody of significant relevance, not a man who texts you “wyd” every hour on the hour and asks if you’re bringing food when you come through.
Do losing good friendships hurt? YES, but in my opinion, it’s far more painful to fathom that somebody you were SO close with crossed you. Assuming that’s the reason y’all fell off. It’s not to say that you guys can’t rekindle your friendship but it’s going to take a lot more doing to look past whatever character flaw caused y’all to fall out in the first place.
As for men, I’m still working on this. I’ve been lied to, cheated on, embarrassed, and far more things that I’m too shamed to even admit I allowed and I was still forgiving. Now looking forward, that’s never going to happen again but the reasons I allowed the situation to continue was too much love for them and not enough love for myself. lack of self worth, and a couple of other things that imma spare y’all on. You kind of have to admit you’re lacking some things internally to stay in a toxic relationship anyway.
My point is, a relationship with your man requires different pieces of yourself than it does with your female friend and I think that’s why one is easier than the other.
I hope this made sense because I felt a little all over the place but this was something I just wanted to address because I believe it is a very common thing.
What are your thoughts? Thanks for reading!