Glow On

I’m sure by now everybody has heard about Camron and JuJu’s breakup but if you haven’t, just click these links to see for yourself and form your own opinion because I’m about to be HELLA biased.

Cam’ron Interview

JuJu’s interview

So we’ve seen this dynamic 1000 times over! right?

boy meets girl
girl supports boy *in the shadows*
girl starts to get shine and step her game up
boy feels a way
*the glow up continues*
boy feels jealous, intimated, and unimportant ultimately ruining the relationship due to ego and insecurity

tammy

Of course none of us are actually Cam’Ron and JuJu so there’s no way to know the entire story but that’s why i’m speaking on this DYNAMIC between men and women instead of their story specifically.

As I continue to go through life, I’ve seen a lot of women have to trade love for success. It is really unfortunate but when you can clearly see there’s more for your life and there’s somebody sitting at your table that is not only NOT happy for you but holding you back, you gotta make the tough decisions to let them go. While this is a hard decision, usually your life begins to pick up right afterward so the pain is definitely worth it.

cardi

Now i’m not talking about being patient with a person while they try to find their legs in life and leaving them in the dust when they aren’t moving at your pace. THAT is whack because people come into their own in their own time and when the glow up DOES happen for them you gonna be REAL salty standing on the outside looking in.

belly

However, I’ve seen on the flip side where men are able to get their ego to take a backseat and support their women but the women have to make a conscious effort to still make their man feel important and in a sense tend to their ego.

My personal belief is that there is enough room for BOTH people to shine and since you’re working for the same team, all you’re really doing is bossing up your own kingdom. Where’s the crime in that??

Some people are so comfortable in one dynamic though whether it be them being the primary provider or them being the one in control that if that dynamic changes, they don’t know how to function in a different light. That’s a real problem! Partnership is about growth and change so you’d be crazy to enter a relationship thinking that the person you’re with isn’t going to change with time. You should both be pushing each other to evolve and encouraging each other to be their best self.will and jada

The main thing that let me know Cam’ron was feeling a way was his whole “It just wasn’t fun anymore” statement. Everybody knows that relationships are full of ups and downs and sometimes you DO lose the spark but you’d be insane to end things instead of coming up with new ways to spark the flame.

I think the biggest thing about growing with a person is being able to check yourself and be honest enough to say, you’re feeling a way and explore why that is. If you don’t, you’ll let small things turn into big things just because you don’t have your mind right and that will start to develop negative characteristics inside you.

lurk

There’s no reason trivial things like social media should have a significant impact on a relationship that has stood the test of time. If it does, you’re dealing with a different issue like maybe:

one person isn’t getting as much attention as they would like so they start looking for it from people on social media or you start to feel insignificant so you do publicity stunts to make you feel less inferior but that’s why it’s so important to check in with your partner.

I honestly believe that sometimes it IS ok for the man to sit in the passenger seat. Now let me be clear. I’m not saying it’s cool for him to not have a job and not contribute anything to the house. I’m saying maybe he’s making less money than you for a period of time and you have to be able to take the financial reigns in the relationship. That’s fine! You should WANT a partner who is able to do that. That’s why Cam’ron’s attitude of “this isn’t fun anymore” baffles me because all she was trying to do was make sure they would be FOREVER straight.

If I had to give any advice from this situation for ladies, it would be to always do you FOR you. People love to talk about the “I’m an independent women and I don’t need no man” spiel but that’s because those type of woman don’t HAVE to stick around the for bs. If you’re not being treated right, you have all the resources you need to leave.

The other piece that goes with that is being your own person. That’s why I say do you FOR you. If JuJu had been so stuck on having her ducks in a row for Cam’Ron, she would’ve been mentally imprisoned in the situation EVEN THOUGH she has the resources to leave. This would’ve led to all types of disrespect levels which we can already see was starting to happen in the very end according to JuJu’s interview.

If a man is feeling some type of way about your success, those are HIS issues to work out within himself and NOTHING you do is going to assist in that process. It’s truly something that you have to detach yourself from in order to continue growing. Dead the situation and let the people who wanna see you win enter your life.

So that’s all I have for you guys! What are your thoughts on situations like this? Thanks for reading!

XO,

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3 thoughts on “Glow On

  1. I completely agree girl and I was saying the same damn thing! He was pretty jealous when his girl was glowin’ up. I never understood why men (or should I say boys), get a certain type of way when their females become bigger than they are. As Got Damn Zo says, “Well if it ain’t about me, let’s keke!” Lovee the post! Definitely subcribing

    Liked by 1 person

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